Ten years ago, I was climbing the ladder of life. Yes, the same ladder we’re told will carry us to success and financial freedom. Working for a global tech company, I was on a dream salary and living the lifestyle that went with it: luxury cars, travelling the world, Michelin restaurants, flying helicopters – I’m sure you get the idea. I believed my worth was determined by my status and my success at work.
It’s funny how we are conditioned to believe this story, whether it feels right or not!
Everything was going great until redundancy hit me like a ton of bricks. The fall from grace smashed my confidence and took me on a rollercoaster of ups and downs. I naïvely believed it couldn’t happen to me. I had always felt safe and secure.
At first, I had a financial security blanket to keep me afloat, but the pain of what I perceived to be failure crippled me mentally and physically. My life had been taken away in a snap. Some days I would be at peace and have a sense of hope; other days would end at the bottom of a crisp packet with a side of self-pity. I can confirm Smarties definitely don’t have the answer!
Rejection felt like a physical attack, and I needed time to heal. Having no visible wounds didn’t make it hurt any less. As the days and weeks rolled past, I realised that being bitter and angry was not going to help me; I decided to use my emotions in a positive way to motivate and drive me forward.
As my focus started to return, I saw a new vision of how life could be. In time, I realised what I perceived to be a personal failure was actually a failure of the company I had invested my life in.
As the fog lifted, I found a force at work, shifting my vision of life and helping me to see the lessons I had been learning. The universe was sending me subtle messages that became clearer the more I tuned in. This was my turning point, and, somehow, I knew I’d been chasing the wrong dream, a dream that was never going to lead to total fulfilment.
You see, while I’d had many fulfilling experiences on my journey, deep down, I realised none of them gave me total life fulfilment. And that’s what I wanted. I needed to thrive on the pain of my experience to become the person I never knew I was born to be.
Now, I live my passion. I coach others and help them find their own sense of success and balance.
Finding your unique purpose is key, but it can be misaligned if you don’t pay enough attention to what you really want – and ignore what others insist you want. Whilst the process of redundancy was a hard lesson, it also gave me the time and space to rediscover myself.
Look for the lesson in every situation. During times of struggle, it may not be clear, so you need to actively ask yourself ‘what have I learnt?’ to learn the most about yourself.
Keep moving forward and grasp opportunities as they arise and make sure you step outside your comfort zone once in a while. Success will come when you are comfortable with who you are and your abilities. Without testing yourself, you’ll never know what you’re capable of. Too often, we try to mould ourselves to fit the ideals of others, we rely on external validation. It holds us back from realising our dreams and confuses our true desires, so we end up overworked and unfulfilled.
For me, life today looks a little different to the original plan, but it is so much better than I could have imagined. I learnt the hard way, but now I see the bigger picture and know I have walked the right path to get to where I am. I know the future is bright, and I can’t wait to bask in the glow!
Know that you are not alone in this journey and it is OK to take time to think through your next steps. Feel what you need to feel and take action when you are open to change.
When you are, get in touch. Let me give you 60 minutes of my time to listen to your situation and give you guidance.
If you want to get ahead of the curve, book on the same coaching program that took me from lost, to finding my passion and purpose. You can find out more here COACHING PROGRAMS